Jan-U-ary

Jan-U-ary 

This month is notoriously the time when people jump on new resolutions, try to better themselves, d'iet, spend less, read more..... etc. One of my resolutions this year is to be unappologetically me. Now- that does not mean for one second that I am excusing my sometimes crabby behavior and therefore removing the words "I am sorry" from my vocabulary. Nope. Those 3 words are important parts of any Christians life, because our acceptance of God's grace comes from first recognizing that we are sinners. My "unappologetically me" resolution has a lot more to do with the conversations I have in my head all day, every day. "You shouldn't wear that, it isn't quite flattering". "Oh don't share that photo, there is laundry in the back ground, what will people say?". "What are some adverbs I can toss on to my prior work experience so people believe I used to be successful at more than just human incubation?".  "Lets find a makeup that makes you look as good as Snapchat filters do". The list is pretty endless.... and at the end of the day I think most women are emotionally exhausted from THEMSELVES. Why do we do that? NOPE, not me, not anymore. I vow that this year I will cut myself a break. Yes, I am still planning to lose the rest of the weight from my 3rd baby, but I will make diet choices based on a love for my body, not because I hate____ about it. I will work out because I want to be my strongest self. I will read the bible because being a part of God's word hits the mute button on those voices I am working to silence. I vow to be the best Mom I can be, to spend intentional time nurturing my children's gifts. I will not beat myself up if that nurturing sometimes come out in a loud not so patient voice ;)  I vow to be me, wobbly bits, caffeine junkie, thin hair, not always put together, but dependent on the grace of God. 

If you could look at a snap shot of your day today would you be brave enough to post that unfiltered version on Facebook? Join me in a year of un-filtering, un-appologizing, and un-derstanding that we are all messy, silly, exhausted works in progress and that is ENOUGH. 

Dear God, I pray for the beautiful women reading this blog today. For their families, and the ones who will be a part of their families in the future. I pray for the mess we all carry. For the choices we make daily for our selves and for those loved ones; both little choices and big ones God, may they align with your will. Lord I ask that this year we would be gifted with new eyes, that we would see our mess as you see it, that we would be able to brush off the dusty bits and recognize the masterpiece underneath. Eph. 2:10 "For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago." In a world that constantly tells us we are not enough, help us remember who we were created to be. Amen.

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Jan-U-ary

Happy Tree's

Several weeks ago I took my little ones on a nature hike. Fall is my absolute favorite season and this was just about the last week of leaves we had before they gave way to winters nakedness. As we walked I snapped tons of photographs of the jewel toned shapes reflecting light from up above us. Branches played hosts to the most beautiful patterns and textures. Fall is how I know God loves me because everything explodes in warm hues and I'm convinced those trees are happy trees! 

Anyways, after walking a while we got to a part of the trail where the wind had already taken most of the leaves off the trees. My daughter asked me "what happens to all the leaves that have already fallen, mama?". 

I tried quickly to come up with an answer that wouldn't crush her tender heart so I said "Well honey, they have already served their purpose and now they get to rest all winter long like a blanket for the roots of the trees". I could almost here the Family Feud crowd shouting "Good Answer, Good Answer" in my head. But I felt like there was probably something more to this God and I would have to sort through later. I think more often than not God uses my teaching moments with my children to teach me in turn. 

As I thought about this the rest of the day and actually weeks after I began to formulate this idea of nakedness/newness. Yesterday our pastor mentioned in his sermon that 2016 has been called by social scientists the worst year ever- the year filled with the most negative things ever recorded. Ya'll that means we out complained the Great Depression, Vietnam, & The Civil War. That's ridiculous and I'm sure social media has a big part to play in this mass ability to just spew our feelings. 

Let's get back to the trees for a second. We often celebrate trees and their beauty in the Fall and again when they blossom in the Spring. BUT - what about that naked part in the middle? If you are up North those trees may be covered in a white winter coat, down here in the South they are just sprinkled with wet bark and moss right now. At first glance they can seem like sad, lonely shells of the massive beauty's they were a few weeks prior. There is a purpose to the nakedness.

 Stripping away all that is old from the previous year leaves (ha ha ha pun)  room for the new things to come. So much like the trees we have the wisdom of our achievements and mistakes from 2016 laid out at our feet and 2017 can only spring up from here. Even the Lily starts as a dull brown bulb, planted into cold and dark winter soil. Given nourishment and a few months time, it blossoms into Easter's favorite flower. Timing is everything, isn't it? If you are in a season where you feel like you have been stripped of your glory, beauty, sleep, sanity, pride, money, or joy..... please know that you are not alone in the dark. Know that each season serves it's purpose and God is refining you for the blooming that is to come. 

 I would love to walk along side you in this coming year and flood our lives with the good& beautiful. The only way to make the world a more beautiful place is to use the voice God gave you and act. Life has seasons just like this tree, my season is still a busy, crazy, overstuffed, under rested one, and yet I'm so excited to bring 2017 to life by sharing more love.  I resolve that this year I will be less of me and more of Jesus, I want to complain less and be more grateful,  I will bloom where He plants me ( as we move yet again), & I will grow in love. 

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Happy Tree's

Fix-it-Friday Tackling Fondant

This Fix-it Friday post is a few weeks overdue, but there is never a bad time to learn how to fondant your own cake! I promise it is life changing and it will make you re-think paying $$$ for designer cakes. This recipe was passed down to me by my cousin who used to make cakes professionally and the best part it, it is fondant that tastes good!

Lets talk grocery list, because if I don't make a list before I shop there is no telling what I will come home with.
First off you need a bag of mini Jet Puff marshmallows
2 TBS of water
1 microwave safe bowl
1 silicon spatula or scraper
Crisco
1 bag of powdered sugar
A Kitchenaid Mixer or a Good  Mixer and Strong Hands for the finish
Food Coloring
plastic wrap
a large space for rolling out fondant
** OPTIONAL**a plastic table cloth taped to your work space so you can just toss it at the end

Now we are ready to begin- Take your microwave bowl and about 1tbs of crisco and grease the inside of the bowl. Pour your marshmallows into the bowl and add 2TBS of water. Place your bowl in the microwave or 1 minute. Stir and check to see if everything is nicely melted and smooth. If it isn't gooey then microwave it a little longer in 15 second increments until you reach a smooth texture. Use your spatula to scrape the marshmallow goo into your Kitchenaid bowl if you will be using it, if not, then just keep it where it is. Next we will be adding our powdered sugar slowly while we mix. Add a little- mix, add a little- mix until you get a nice pizza dough consistency! The amount of powdered sugar needed to get you to a doughey texture will depend a lot on the age of your marshmallows. So, if you don't end up needing the whole bag that is ok!
(If you are using a hand mixer, do not fear I made my first fondant cake this way and it will be more work but it is totally doable. As your fondant comes together it will become too hard to mix with your hand mixer. Once it reaches that point, crisco your hands and then start kneading the fondant by hand, sprinkling in some more sugar and kneading it again.)
Once we have "dough" wrap it nicely in plastic wrap and place it in the fridge to cool and rest for about an hour.

Once it is rested you will begin the coloring process. Seperate it into as many sections of color as you need to create your cake. For this cake I had some orange, purple, white and a tiny bit of black. Now channel your inner child and think playdough. Grab that section of fondant, pour in about 5 or 6 drops of color and squish! If your fondant is sticky coat the table with a little more powdered sugar and put a little on your hands squish, squish, squish! Knead and knead that fondant and the color will spread through it. If you need a deeper color add more coloring,

When you are ready to roll the color out sprinkle down some more powdered sugar and put a little on your rolling pin too. Lay out the fondant and roll away. You want about 1/4 inch thickness. The thinner it is the easier it will rip when you try and move it. For my example I am covering the ghost on top of our cake which was actually a rice crispie treat I formed in a coffee mug and scooped out. Either cake or Crispie needs to be coated in a buttercream frosting before you add fondant. The buttercream acts as the "glue" to hold the fondant in place.

Then we roll and cover! If you lift the fondant to place it on the cake and it either sticks or rips, do not stress. You can squish it back up, roll it out again and ta da- no one will ever know. If it sticks lay down more powdered sugar, if it rips- roll it a little thicker. See, playdough. 

The rest is just decortive details and adding your own special touch. I use cookie cutters and lids to cut shapes, I used a butter knife for things like the eyes and freehanded them. Wet your finger and gently dab the back of one piece of fondant to make it stick to another piece (ie:eyes and mouth). 

Congratulations- you just graduated from the cake makers Fondant 101 class! 

Here are a few more pictures from my kiddos Haloween/Birthday Bash 

Happy Baking! 

For party food my tip is let pinterest and other idea books inspire you but KEEP it SIMPLE. A stressed Mama loses the "Happy" in celebrating the Birthday. 

My kiddos helped me paint our backyard "carnival" games. We had a pumpkin bean bag toss and ring around the Frankenstein.  

Frank was a favorite! All 3 hoops were different sizes and I found them at dollar tree. 

Thanks for partying with me and letting me share my creativity with you!

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Fix-it-Friday Tackling Fondant

R.E.S.T.

 Exodus 33:14 The LORD replied, “My Presence will go with you, and I will give you rest"

First of all thank you all for being patient and loving as I have taken a few down days! I think we can all agree that when one child is sick it is hard, but in the course of the last week we have had 3 different doctors appointments, one ER visit, several trips to the pharmacy and countless applications of vicks or oils! I really wish someone would invent IV coffee, hook me up Scotty.

But in all seriousness, this year has been killer for us as far as the icky viral things go, moving as often as we do it is always a fresh batch of new germs every cold season and if your counter looks anything like this today, GIRL- I am so there with ya!

May the bleach flow freely, the tissues keep-a-coming, and the coffee stay hot. All three of my sweet babies coughed in choreographed unison this morning and in perfect syncopated tone too! Bless their little hearts. I can say that we were told we are no longer contagious so the house arrest has been lifted. But, I can't shake the fear that animal control will pull over my swagger wagon because it sounds like I am transporting 3 baby seals in the backseat. And if Croup wasn't hard enough poor baby Judah's two front teeth chose this week to join the party! He has been one soggy, sad, mess.  As I struggle to give around the clock meds and keep dosing straight I wanted to share one simple and effective hack, add a sticker to the bottom of everyone's medicine cup so there is no extra germ sharing.

In the wee morning hours when my eyes aren't even sure if they are open yet, being able to look down at the cups and easily tell who's is who's is much easier with stickers. You might be wondering how am I remembering to give thanks in the midst of my sleep deprivation and crabby baby meltdowns? Heck, I am wondering it somedays. That is honesty- honestly, some of these past few days I don't feel very thankful, or very happy.... I just long for those days when adult naps were still a thing or I day dream about inventing bubble suits that keep crazy viral things from tearing apart the peace and sanity of my home. But in my heart I know better, I know that this is a season and that the icky hard seasons make us stronger and more grateful when the germs have gone. So I REST- Remember in Every Season to be Thankful, I give thanks and I wait as patiently as a zombie mom can, for that sweet bliss of a full nights rest awaiting our family on the other end of this cold. If God hasn't opened a door you praise Him in the hallway, and when healing hasn't come yet, we praise Him from the bed/couch/doctors office.

Today I gave God thanks for 4 days of fever free kids, for modern medicine, for herbal teas, for deep hugs and kids who still think they "need" me. Boy do I know that someday soon they won't think they need me at all! I am grateful that healing is closer today than it was yesterday. I know God is with me in the rocking chair at 1am when the baby is crying and just wants to be held. I feel God holding me as I hold a little boy who is coughing too hard to sleep, assuring him that he will be better in time. I am so thankful my kids have each other; while having 3 sick kids is not easy, watching those sick kid love on each other, hand each other tissues, and cover each other in blankets has just melted my soul. They are good kids, good, sick, sweet, sticky kids! There is a lot to be thankful for.

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R.E.S.T.

Well Croup ....

Well, it should be no secret by my blog title that our household is battling a case of croup. Our 7 month old has been up most of the night the past two days and he isn't napping much at all. He cries when he coughs, he cries when he is set down, he isn't nursing well, and his beautiful smile is hidden behind sad eyes. As a parent there are few situations that are harder on our hearts than when one of our children is sick and there is nothing we can do to make it better. I literally kissed my sweet baby boys head and told him I wished that I had gotten sick first so that I would have the antibodies he needed to fight this. Let's face it, we would do a manner of crazy things for the good of our children. Including wishing an awful lung infection on ourselves in order to spare them.

But, this is a season of thanksgiving and I have committed to making today a day to rejoice! So, in spite of the lack of sleep, energy, and smiles at my house- we woke up alive, Amen. We may not have slept well, but we did sleep in beds, Amen. Thanks to modern medicine, my baby is slightly better today which gives me hope, AMEN. My other two are finally old enough to understand that they need to be a little quieter, and a little less demanding when someone else in the house is ill, so they have been easier than normal today, big Amen. Friends, on the ickiest of croupy days there is always a reason to give praise. The icky days help us re-establish that perspective and our faith that God is still in control on the icky days brings us peace. That brings me to the 3rd P of a grateful heart, perseverance.  1 Thessalonians 5:18 "In everything give thanks. This is what God wants you to do because of Christ Jesus.". Knowing that a situation is hard, or croupy- is easy, it just requires admitting your emotions are valid. Perseverance to keep your faith and continue to praise God in the midst of the croup of life is where the heart of gratitude grows.

This time of year leaves are bursting in to color right outside my window. Tree's are shedding their bold summer looks for a more demure winter ensemble. Deep below the surface of the gently fading grass, there is an intricate system of roots that anchor each tree, they are the life and the breath of its being. Those roots do not sink in to soft soil and flourish, if the only soul around them is soft soil it will all wash away in a strong rain and the roots will be exposed causing the tree to lose it's balance and topple over. Roots are designed to wriggle into the hard places. They creep around rocks, burrow through clay, and the wider they spread the better the tree is anchored. (Why yes I am about to draw a beautiful parallel to your life). It is the same with our lives. The hard rocks and tough clay are hard to get through, but on the other side.... they leave us better anchored and stronger. We wriggle our way through the croup, on our knees, sometimes you may feel you are more on your belly.... we persevere and we see that God was faithful and we are stronger than we were before. Luke 1:37"For the word of God will never fail." Make sure you are anchored and then rejoice, there are so many things to be thankful for in every season. 

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Well Croup ....

A peace of gratitude

First off, yesterday I failed to post a devotion and I'm sorry. I spent my entire day facilitating a small group for a great Christian Woman's Ministry called Planting Roots and when the day was over I was just talked out! My plan for yesterday was to peel back the next layer in a "heart of Gratitude". We already discussed perspective and now let's talk about peace. If perspective is the heart of gratitude, peace is the blood that keeps things pumping. My husband often jokes with me that my generation will all have heart attacks by the time we are 40 because of Pinterest. He is convinced we are stressing ourselves out with self imposed levels of "greatness" to attain approval or praise. We become driven by pinterest and the need to be Super - mom and not driven by what God actually calls us to do to be Spiritual - mom's. I am not about to call Pinterest the devil. I find it very helpful when I need a fresh recipe idea or in planning a party. But I also have to keep myself in check so I don't go overboard in competition with professionally taken birthday photos, hand carved watermelon sculptures and monogrammed goodie bags. I asked a bible study of women I was leading last fall to list the top 10 things that steal their peace- these are some of their answers.
1. Not prepping ahead of time for the day, and having to rush (there is that rush word again)
2. Comparing ourselves to other Mom's
3. Competition via FB, Pinterest, Instagram to appear to have it "all together"
4. Traffic
5. When our children don't listen

I won't list all 10, but the top 5 gives us plenty to talk about. So, why is peace so important to gratitude? Because when our hearts are truly at peace then all that stuff that gets in the way of our gratitude falls away. If you're confident in WHO God says you are,  what Polly-PTA or Peggy-Pinterest think of you doesn't matter. When you align your will with the Lord's and don't just say "this is the day that the Lord has made, I will rejoice and be glad" but you act on that rejoicing - then traffic, rushing... none of that can steal your peace because you're putting God back in the drivers seat and you're letting go of control. Ohhh that's a hard word. Especially for me,  I have a hard time not trying to do it all on my own. I don't know who I'm trying to prove myself to half of the time.  I confess that I am so guilty of not giving God enough of the control and doing too much on my own. When I feel myself running low on peace,  chances are I'm clinging to done of those peace thieves listed above and I haven't been listening to God's gentle guiding voice because I'm blaring my Super-mom anthem a little too loud.
Isaiah 26:12 "LORD, you establish peace for us; all that we have accomplished you have done for us." Ouch again. Did you catch that last part?  "ALL we have accomplished YOU (the Lord) have done FOR us." That means even if I rock that cake out and my fondant skills are on point,  or we all get off one perfect family photo for the holidays... we get zero credit. It was God given skill, God gifted timing,  or God's grace that helped us accomplish the desires of our heart.  And Ta-da we just arrived at true Gratitude! 

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A peace of gratitude

The Heart of Gratitude

So, I was brainstorming last night about the ways in which I want to thematically link all my devotional posts while still giving the Holy Spirit room to talk. I do not what this blog series to be as sporadic as my 3 year olds mood swings, but I also know that any Christian writer worth their title gives all works and credit to the Divine Author. I prayed a bit and I did a little research. Then, I found this great article on The 3 Levels of Gratitude where they explain gratitude as this-

Thanksgiving Gratitude – This is when someone thinks about being grateful when they are reminded to do so, such as at Thanksgiving. Generally, individuals that are at this level only think about the gratitude for the very basic of things such as family, friends, job/business, car/home, pets and their chosen higher power. Beyond this basic list, they struggle to think of additional things for which to be grateful

Positive Gratitude – At this level, an individual is likely to feel and express gratitude on a regular, consistent basis -maybe even daily. They are able to see gratitude in a larger range of things such as a sunny day, a new opportunity, a hug or smile.  The Positive Gratituders are more observant and recognize all the good things that they have in their lives.

Positive Gratituders don’t need to be reminded to be grateful but generally do so consciously.

Higher Gratitude – Once a person reaches this level, they are able to be grateful for EVERYTHING in their lives. This level requires a person to be able to appreciate both the good and the perceived bad in any and every situation. A person at Higher Gratitude can be grateful for job loss, divorce, even loss of a loved one. Being able to connect with and see the aspects of any situation that one could be grateful for is what leads one to achieve Higher Gratitude.

This level of gratitude finds one feeling and expressing their gratitude from an almost subconscious place.  It is a natural and normal part of who they are.

So with that little bite to chew on, lets spend a few days diving in to practical ways to move from "Thanksgiving Gratitude" to "Positive Gratitude". If you are anything like me, it is really easy to commit to things at first. I love to volunteer and lend a hand when it is needed. But as time goes on, and life stuff happens I get bogged down by the things I have committed to. Sound familiar? Sometimes it is really hard to muster that daily "I am thankful day 12 of 27......" post for Facebook. Sometimes you want to drink the wine instead of cooking with it, shhh there is no judgment here. So, let's see what the bible says about gratitude;

"And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him." Colossians 3:17

Now lets break down those three levels really quickly. Level One- I like to think of as the Facebook level. Where our gratefulness is more surface level because we know we should be thankful. #soblessed, #youaremorethanastereotype #GodcravesmoreofyouthanwhatyoushowyourFBfriends Ok, forgive the hashtag pun, but there is a lot of truth in that last bit. What we show people on FB, Instagram, or via snapchat filter is exactly that, a FILTERED version of our real, messy, not very "pretty" lives. #2 Positive Gratitude is the heart switch between, I am grateful because I know I am blessed and "I am grateful because I realize every good and perfect thing in my life is a gift from above." The act of not just appreciating what we have been given, but stopping to praise the one who gave it to us.

Now, there are very few people I have ever known in my life who reach a level of gratitude like #3. Higher Gratitude is what I think of when I think of Paul and his praise to God despite his deplorable circumstances. Job is another bible hero of faith who comes to mind. My reality is that I am at a place in my life now where I can look at the bad and appreciate the lessons I learned and the path those ugly parts of life put me on, because they built me the foundation for the life I have now. I am grateful for the times I was pushed to my limits and I came out smiling, because my faith grew by miles in those dark times.

But, I also think we kind of live somewhere in this middle ground that is not mentioned in the article and I would like to call that land "Perspective Gratitude" that is the gratitude that comes with the wisdom of mistakes and hard lessons. Where we learn to truly appreciate the awesome fully encompassing love of Jesus because we know what it is like to be unlovable. There really is much wisdom that comes with age. So, what would life look like if "In Word, In Deed, Whatever you do, (you did) everything in the name of Jesus, giving thanks to Him"?? Would it be a little easier to forgive that hurt you are holding on to? Would it be a little easier to appreciate the beautiful blessings of your life, even if they left sticky fingerprints all over your clean house today? Would it be simpler to make choices because you know you need to choose the option that Glorifies God, over what seems tempting or "easy"? How do you think you model gratitude for you children? Do they hear you give thanks in the tough times or do they hear angry frustrated sighs because we lost our perspective? Food for thought as we dig our toes into gratitude and how our heart's focus affects the way our eyes view the world around us.

And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful. Colossians 3:15

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The Heart of Gratitude